This past weekend, I met a couple. The more I looked at them and saw them interact, something didn’t feel right, so I asked her, “How long have you been dating?”
She responded, “three years.”
“He’s 27, and you’re how old?”
“Why aren’t you married yet?”
“oh, we not ready.”
Not ready?! How could they not be ready for marriage? I’m sorry, but 3 years of dating the person you’re going to marry is a really long time. That’s an extremely long time to stay pure. She gave me a great argument though, she’s trying to be cautious about the whole situation, because she doesn’t want her parent’s marriage.
I’m all for being cautious, and whatnot, but if you still haven’t figured out if you and your mate aren’t compatible for marriage after THREE YEARS of dating, I’m going to be bold and say that you probably will never figure it out, and should move on.
I think this particular couple knew, though. Her response, and her confidence in our conversation led me to believe that they knew what they had was solid marriage material. If you know you’re going to marry someone, and you don’t have college in the way (people do get married in college), then why prolong it? Why draw it out? Get married! My opinion (in case you haven’t figured it out by now): It’s incredibly stupid to wait longer.
The sin issue: it is incredibly hard to stay pure when dating. It’s only by God’s guidance and the reassurance of His promises that it’s possible. Couples struggle with being pure all the time, and often stumble. With the purest of couples, it’s just in their thoughts.
Here’s something that I found in this :
“I’ve found that protection against sexual sin and the opportunity and the pleasure associated with monogamous sexual intimacy with the woman I love to be a very real benefit of marriage.
What about divorce? Divorce (in Christian and secular marriages) is nothing more than a lack of reverence for and attachment to God’s Word. Marriage is hard, but when God says more than once that divorce is not your “I’m bored” or “I’m mad at you” loophole, He means it. But what about adultery? Yes, God does allow divorce in an adulterous situation, that doesn’t mean that He ordered it. It is not a commandment that we should follow. My opinion: (it could change if I were ever placed in a situation like that) is that Christ died for his adulterous Bride so He could be closer to her, and that is the example set before us.
I don’t know why I’m so fired up about this. I think over the past few days, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m tired of the whole singleness ‘game’. I’m ready for a new set of struggles.