To inaugurate my 27th year of life I:
1) Heard the Happy Birthday Song 4 times
2) Went to church
3) Wore a dress
4) Played the Wii version of BopIt and failed. Miserably
5) Got some pretty stellar earrings from my twin
6) Was emailed a “special birthday coupon” from EMS
7) Won a Mac-battle with my brother (don’t ask; just know that I’m a genius.)
8) Remembered my last birthday
9) Worked on a friend’s Christmas present
10) Deliberated on how to spend my iTunes gift card
11) Got a haircut
12) Found a gray hair during said haircut
13) Listened to a ridiculously dumb song long enough to have it ingrained. in. my. brain. for.ev.er.
14) Pondered for far too long over this list
15) Drove to Philly in my sister’s Bimmer
16) Saw dead people
17) Saw a the insides of a dead camel
18) Wore heels with jeans
19) Tried to remember the last time I wore heels with jeans
20) Ate dinner with the family
21) Had fondu for birthday dessert
22) Played some games
23) Won some tickets
24) Bought silly things with said tickets
25) Actually contemplated using the “special birthday coupon” from EMS
26) Received a million and five Facebook notifications

My 25th birthday stunk. I remember crying on the phone with my best friend hoping that the awful day wasn’t a reflection of the year to come. It was my birthday and I was sitting at home; alone.

If you have read my birthday post, you may remember that I alluded to some pain that I was writhing in. The day before (Friday, the 26th) I was diagnosed with shingles. Shingles is the old chicken pox virus (that never leaves your system) waking up and wreaking havoc on one nerve stem in your body. While it’s mainly a nerve-thing (complete with knife-wielding, sharp pain), a common side effect is a rash on the skin where that particular nerve system ends (I suppose this is where the name for the disorder comes from).

Another side effect happens to be depression. When I was reading up on shingles, I didn’t really think that this could be possible. I even told my discipler this and she promptly gave me a look (and rightly so) that said 1) that’s ridiculous and 2) you will not blame your sin on this. But, after a conversation with a friend I’ve found that I’m not the only one with shingles who was uncharacteristically melancholy.

I digress. While I’m not 100% back to normal on the emotional scale, I am on the other side of my 48-hour depression. Through a conversation today at lunch, I came to an eye-opening conclusion: this was an amazing experience. While everyone at some point in time deals with depression on different levels, clinical depression is a different ball game.  And while I never wish those feelings of despondency upon someone else or myself again, tons of lessons can be gleaned from it and used to encourage others.

By the power of the Holy Spirit, the fight of faith can be won even with clinical, non-circumstantial depression. The ability to honor God in all situations is given to every believer at the point of salvation. Faith is the outworking of that power when all our emotions are screaming against it. I am convinced that this is where the power of God is most revealed. It is only by His power in us that we are able to say no to our flesh, no to those feelings of selfishness and lack of life-certainty and walk in a manner worthy of the gospel.

I spent most of my birthday fighting. With every shovel-full of snow, with every phone call, with every knife in my side I was desperately reminded that I was very alone. And while I had no desire whatsoever to do anything but take a bath in those emotions, I forced my self to take them to the cross. I praise the Lord that through His Spirit, I have trained myself to run to the Completer of my faith on a regular basis. That day, while my default was bathing, I ran against everything inside me, blindly running to the cross.

While I didn’t find immediate peace and joy, comfort in doing the Christ-exalting thing or even comfort in God’s Word, I had hope. I had a hope that God’s Word was true; I would eventually see the light at the end of my dark and dreary tunnel. I had a hope that honoring God then would bring great joy now.

In conclusion, exercising faith is a daily habit. I believe that God is most-honored when we don’t want to honor Him but do regardless of our feelings. Honoring God during a mountain-top, emotional high is easy. Honoring Him and His word while in the valley of the shadow of death is hard and impossible without the power of the Holy Spirit. This brings me great joy.

Of all the non-circumstantial promises found in the Bible, this is my favorite:

2 Peter 1:3
His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence.

Today is the day I set aside every year to celebrate my birth. Some years, I’m home sharing it with my twin, some years I’m not. This year is a case of the latter. Today, on my 25th birthday, I am in Speculator.

Things I’m doing today:

• Studying my Bible
• Prepping some Bible lessons for next month
• Writhing in pain
• Shoveling 3 feet of wet, heavy snow
• Chipping away at 3 inches of ice underneath that snow
• Dinner at Tracy’s
• Catching up with friends after dinner

So for the most part, the day will be similar to other days off, except today I’m getting more emails and phone calls. I am forced, however (especially with the time it’s taking to chip away at ice), to remember my 24th year of life. The Lord has brought me through much, molded me greatly and sustained me every step of the way.

While I was in Africa, I spent most of my quite time reading through the Psalms. While I’m waiting for my Bible study to kick back up, I’ve continued this reading pattern. This morning, on December 27th, I read through the 27th Psalm. It’s always interesting when you find a section of scripture that you identify with. As a believer, those sections are everywhere and are particularly neat on your birthday:

Psalms 27
1 The LORD is my light and my salvation;
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life;
of whom shall I be afraid?
2 When evildoers assail me
to eat up my flesh,
my adversaries and foes,
it is they who stumble and fall.
3 Though an army encamp against me,
my heart shall not fear;
though war arise against me,
yet I will be confident.
4 One thing have I asked of the LORD,
that will I seek after:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD
and to inquire in his temple.
5 For he will hide me in his shelter
in the day of trouble;
he will conceal me under the cover of his tent;
he will lift me high upon a rock.
6 And now my head shall be lifted up
above my enemies all around me,
and I will offer in his tent
sacrifices with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make melody to the LORD.
7 Hear, O LORD, when I cry aloud;
be gracious to me and answer me!
8 You have said, Seek my face.
My heart says to you,
Your face, LORD, do I seek.
9 Hide not your face from me.
Turn not your servant away in anger,
O you who have been my help.
Cast me not off; forsake me not,
O God of my salvation!
10 For my father and my mother have forsaken me,
but the LORD will take me in.
11 Teach me your way, O LORD,
and lead me on a level path
because of my enemies.
12 Give me not up to the will of my adversaries;
for false witnesses have risen against me,
and they breathe out violence.
13 I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living!
14 Wait for the LORD;
be strong, and let your heart take courage;
wait for the LORD!

Cheers!

Our youngest attender was Chloe; she’s pretty much the cutest thing on two legs. Even though smiling wasn’t an option when we took this photo, she’s a ham. The lovely lady laughing is Ang, who is married to the other half of the party. She put a lot of effort into the party and the cakes. Thanks Ang!

As you remember, Mike and I are not from the same country and tried to play off that for the party. So, I made t-shirts. His said, “The Canadian,” and mine, “The American.” Naturally, I really messed up on his shirt, and mine is just fine. One of these days, I’ll take you through the process of screen printing and you’ll see why it’s easy to botch a shirt.

The invitations said, “Birthday presents welcome,” so these balloons made it into our hands. They’re a re-gift from someone else’s birthday two weeks before. Rock on. Thanks Brian. Thanks Tracy for opening up your home!

This will be my first joint birthday party that doesn’t involve my twin. I will be 24years and 23days old at the party. I don’t know how old Mike the Canadian will be. He is older than I.

Who knows what the party will hold. We’ve discussed a money tree. Any thoughts?