not a local

I forgot to tell you all a funny story from yesterday, so you must endure it now, I suppose. Yesterday morning I was laying in bed trying to doze off again when I assumed that I had heard the sound of a coffee grinder. My head immediately popped off the pillow, and I said to myself, “daddy’s making coffee without me!” So I ran downstairs to find out that the beautiful sound of whole coffee beans being freshly ground to make an Ethiopian masterpiece in a cup was not, in fact, coffee beans making their way to my tummy, but dog food being thrown haphazardly into a stainless steel bowl. Tear. I got out of bed for dog food.

I added that picture in of myself for no good reason but to add to the randomness of this post.

My assistant is a ninja. He often goes to the gym to keep up his ninja-physique. He just told me the story of how he was there the other day and another guy was there acting strangely. Upon getting to know this guy in the small gym in our small town, it turns out that he used to be a professional wrestler and now he’s a hollywood stunt double.  My assistant also told him that he was looking for a sparring partner; this guy offered. The ninja fights the professional wrestler. I want to be there.

This is from october, I’m just now getting around to sharing it. My dad and my brother decided to carve their pumpkins with the most testosterone possible. Power tools and fire.